BL NC* - $29.75 // Kzka ↑4.½ - $22.0 // Nar ↑0.¾ - $37.0 // Ser NC* - $37.50 // SaiCha ↑15.0 - $45.0 // JkuSM ↓2.½ - $20.50 // GaKu ↑2.¾ - 33.0 // Eprxy ↑2.0 – $32

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Bakumatsu Kikansetsu Irohanihoheto 13 (AKA: "playwrights are GAR")

Investors were surprised by a sudden surge in Tuesday trading.

Booting up bsplayer there was no doubt in my mind; I was 110% resolute. There was NO WAY that I was continuing after episode 13. This would most certainly be the last time I watch this convoluted series with more confusing names and supporting cast members than Pani Poni Dash. Definitely.

Especially after we discovered how the gunslinger lost his eye. Big burlyman brawl? Fighting pirates? Attacked by ninja grizzly bears? Nope. A carriage accidentaly kicked up a pebble into his retina. Dissapointing mythology for a badass character to say the least. So like I said, I was done with the show.

Turns out he's not GAR at all, and is just a big mammas boy.

Well, it didn't quite work out that way. I tried. I really tried. But I've got to be frank, and the final act of Sir Soutetsu's play blew my cock to London with a layover in Awesomeistan.

Now sure, I might exaggerate how great a certain scene is ocassionally, to keep things spicy... but this was hands down the best execution of a reveal/climax in any anime I've seen prior. The tarp coming down, the candles, the music, the framing. BLAOW!

I even exclaimed "Holy shit!" aloud (to my own surprise), much like those fat rednecks who go to wrestling shows. Sometimes anime will get a kneejerk reaction of "titties!" or "incest!" from me, but the elusive "holy shit!" chant is a first.

So yeah, I'm watching the next ep. I don't really expect for this quality to hold over, but feel as though I kinda owe them it.

BAKU staves off bankruptcy this week. Can they "stage" (huhu) a comeback?

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Monday, February 26, 2007

Tokyo Majin Gakuen Gazpacho Soup 4

Big scoopin' all day nikkuh.

There was a whole heap of flashback and emo stuff about characters I don't give two shits about, so it was pretty boring this episode.


Well, should I say it was boring, UNTIL THE MOTHERFUCKING DEMON HEAVY-METAL ROCK CROW TURNED UP. It was short lived, but still good times as the giant monster flew about fucking shit up and destroying highways.

I liked how they managed to drop in that schoolgirl from the previous episode. Most series woulda just introduced her now, but TMGK don't roll like that. They'd prefer to confuse you as much as possible. But that's part of it's charm anyway (>_<)b

It's kinda tough to tell how the series is gonna play out right now.. since it still feels very much like introductory-phase, and there's only vague hints at a plot happening. If they play their cards right this could be pretty special.. if not, it should still at least have some pretty cool looking action scenes ^_^

"Dai Scoo~p!"

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Saturday, February 24, 2007

Kanon 21 (AKA "HOLY. SHIT.")

Yes, I've had no experience with Kanon until Kanon 2: Kanon Harder.
I was hoping it wasn't that obvious.

omg, foreshadowing??!

There is seriously something wrong with this series. It drew me in with promises of cute catchphrases and uber moeness... and then they started killing everyone.

Left, right, and center.

Look, I present the facts to you people here today: Yuuichi has more game than any other anime lead in history, yet his success rate with these girls makes Keiichi from Higurashi no Naku Koro ni look like a true fucking winner.

The only logical conclusion I can make of all this, is that Nayuki is psychotic and murdering these bitches out of jealousy. Zettai!

(I was going to say Akiko, coz it always seemed like she had something to hide, but the rogue SUV kinda took care of any suspicions)

What can I tell you? It is.
KEY hate you all; they also hate kittens.

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Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Recaps: Kenichi 9, and the Manabi ep that spawned thousands of yuri doijins

The World's Slowest Fansub, Kenichi 9: The school's most feared gang called Everquest2 is closing in on Kenichi, and the only thing he can do is remain out of sight by hiding himself behind Miu's giant kung-foo breasts.

Luckily though, this entire episode is about Kenichi getting Muay Thai training from Apachai, so ass-whupping should be somewhere in the direct future for our weak legged hero.

Believe it or not though, but the OP has gotten new animation added to it (for the uninitiated, it's pretty much been segments from the first ep up until now), with umm Gar guy and Judo guy knocking the shit out of people.. nothing for the others though.. which is especially a shame for Shigure, because Shigure is made of mountains of tsundere sex chocolate.

[Witty--yet insightful--comment here]

Gakuen Utopia Manabi Straight 5: Manabi-chan has caught the mumps! (Because clearly there's not enough chubby cheeks in this show and we need MOAR) That leaves Mikan and Mei all alone in the student council office to let each other do "this" and "that" beat up gar-sensei for a week.

omg I love Mikan, she's just sooo cute, especially when she does her serious face >:3

Also, Mei is so totally gay for her.. but wait, coz Mikan is totally gay for the rival school's council president! And what's even worse, is that the most obviously dyke character in the series, Mucchi, doesn't seem to be gay for anybody but athletics! Manabi Straight = MIND BLOWING.

Oh and wait, what the fuck does "When friends become buddies" anyway??

Momo copped it off ebay, C.O.D.

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Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Recap: Code Geass 17 (aka, "I still hate Suzaku")

I hate him like impz hates Shiori

Zero and The Order Of The Black Knights are tasked with helping free the Japanese Liberation band frontman, Kyoshirou Toudou, in a daring PRISON BREAK (©20th Century Fox) before Suzaku executes him (because that's his way of the government lapdog-dattebayo). During so, Lelouch finally discovers the identity of the Lancelot pilot and snaps... or has he devised a cunning plan, instead?

Also Princess Euphemia announced that she wants the dirty Japanese peon, Suzaku, as her knight (I'm guessing this is contemporary euphanism for "fucking"? I'm not really up with the terms nowdays). I hope they both get given the Diana/Fayed royal treatment and their asses get assassinated. Goodbye useless Euphemia. Sayonara cockblocking Suzaku.

Worst thing is that now Suzaku's probably going to think that this is proof that towing the line is the best way to bring change to evil Brittanian dictatorships. Yeah, maybe if you're lucky enough to have a Princess on your jock, assmunch.

lol u killed ur Dad, u is failz

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Monday, February 19, 2007

Recaps: Negima?!, Tokyo Majin Buu, and *EXCLUSIVE* Naruto Shippuden!!

Negima?! 14: The class of 3-A continue to be stuck in the world of illusion, Asuna has let loose a giant beast that wants to devour them, and Negi-sensei is still a chucacabra, oh gno!!

Negima?! has perhaps the dullest of couldn't-care-less continual arcs—certainly of those airing today.. so it's really lucky that they've got everything else to fall back on instead.

The comedy and overall vibe of things has picked up from the beginning. Now I'm not sure if it's due to a tangible improvement, or if it's just because the more I watch, the more I forget about how much better the Mahou Sensei Negima! manga is. Either way it seems to work (although I'd still like to see the Mahora festival get butchered adapted.. Can I get a Hellsing OVA treatment in hurr?)

Chix dig magix. Takahata-sensei is lovin' it. Asuna-chan, chance!

And I think it's been mentioned before that sky-diving in anime is pretty rad. Well, imagine sky-diving out of a crumbling castle, miles high in the sky, while 20 or so highschool girls shotacon a preteen teacher in chupacabra form.. that must be like rad x(2+7) to the power of HOLYCOW.

Kaede is so hot.

Naruto Shippuuden 1-2: The time finally arrives and these guys made certain to announce that we're now into some next level shit after all the filler. Everything about this, from the widescreen opening, to the animation, to the title addition, to the music (which I want to point out as especially awesome.. new tracks?) screamed HEY YOU FUCKS, THIS IS A BIG DEAL.

Which is quite something in contrast to the limping from the gates that Bleach decided to pull off with a flaccid two-incher, I may add.

And it's only been 2 episodes and already I'm back into the "omg cliffhanger what happens next?!" phase of Narucrack... sheeeit, dangling balls, GET!

Temari is so hot.

Tokyo Majin Gakuen Kenpuchou 3: We continue to get drip-fed more little tidbits of information this ep.. I don't know if it's a narrative choice or just because they're pressed for time, but I'm kinda digging it. Sure, they coulda done done a five minute explanation of them gaining the antique store as a headquarters, but why waste time with that when you can show Maria-sensei in casual cutoff RAWK! clothes?

Houraiji was really acting like a bit of a dickface this episode. I guess that's his gimmick, but c'mon, Aoi is crazy moe (as in, *really* moe, but with an urban flavor.. not in a "those Higurashi girls are so moe" sense). If Houraiji doesn't support that, the anime industry is doomed to fail.

Ravens mawling tiny Japanese people is so hot.

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Thursday, February 15, 2007

Real blogging is for losers. I've got cheap recaps!

Gakuen Utopia Manabi Straight 4: The epic quest to create the most bestest school fair begins! A bunch of great moments in this ep. Early noms go out to Mika's belief in "little people", the closing "victory pose", and Mei totally fanservicing it up in her bedroom for the pedo tsundere audience.

And ufotable, I love you. Most studios would be happy to just phone this one in now they've got the kimi-otas hooked, but It's only been 4 eps and already you've taken a cute loli show and thrown in some WTF?? In this ep, Mei goes totally Shinji and snaps due to some childhood trauma. However, rather than it ending with her jerking off over a coma patient, Manabi convinces her to believe in the power "Massugu Go!" and stuff.

Personally, I woulda gone for the wank.

Fake-Loli Utopia wants in your house

Tokyo Majin Gakuen Kenpuchou 2: The series flashes back 2 months to before the A-Team formed.. and even then it still doesn't really make a whole lot of sense.. But that doesn't matter because this series is pure awesome, coz people jump out of second floor school buildings and start fights for no reason and there's ghost boobs.

Wasn't as BLAOW as the first ep animation-wise, but it hasn't hit NHK levels yet, so I'm happy about that. And I love the character designs.

Did I mention I love Maria-sensei too?

Ghost Hunt 16: The Shibuya Psychic Research Center continue with the case of the possessed high school, and Mai gets indirect hugz from Naru *squeal*

This series started off real shaky, but it's just gotten better with each case, and this episode was the best one yet, with a pretty damn awesome plot twist at the end. As an aside, I dunno why Mai is so hung up on Naru. Bou-san is way more GAR.

I also just found out that this is based off a Shoujo series, which I find surprising, because it doesn't look like shit. Wheee!

Ghost Hunt

Jigoku Shoujo Futakomori 8: Woot, this week there's a fake Hotline To Hell put up on the intaweb, and Enma Ai decides she ain't taking none of this guff with people sending out tacky porn spam and tarnishing the true loli-demon reputation. A pretty sweet tale of revenge follows (but no Ippen Shinde Miru this week either?! Ah well, I still got to see someone get their ass handed).

And on the subject of MILFs, Hone-onna is pretty smoking. There's just something about that period era prostitute look which is cowabunga. (y'know, Japan style. Not those cheap english whores who were busy putting on rouge and giving serial killers justifiable motivation)

Bakumatsu Kikansetsu Irohanihoheto 12: I was trying to come up with a summary for this ep, when it occured to me that I have absolutely NO CLUE what is really going on here—in fact, I can't even remember the names of 90% of the main characters, let alone the side characters they keep referencing.

Let's just say that I really hope this isn't going to go for 26 eps.

Basugasu Bakuhatsu

D.Gray-Man 16: Just in case you'd forgotten, it's a likely never-ending shounen action series about a group of exorcists who must hunt down "innocence" and stop the Millenium Earl, who looks like Mary Poppins on crack, from like violating the world with an evil umbrella.

This ep Panda goes and fights Hercules from Fate/Stay night coz he's a huge blow-hard, and then Allen comes along and cries about something.

This is another of those series which started out shaky but got better as time went by.. although it's only marginally in this case. And largely due to the fact that Lenalee's Dark Boots are like, the sweetest weapon about, and she looks really hot stomping on chumps heads like Super Mario.

This franchise has a stupid name


Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Editorial: Blonde MILFs Have More Fun


It's true. They make my pants feel all funny and stuff. Which is really weird because I'm totally freeballing right now.

What's even weirder is that I usually don't like blondes at all--MILF or loli (and that strange "void" age in between). I mean, I don't wish for them to be ethnically cleansed or anything, but it's just not my preference, in this thing called "real life" (IRL LOLx0r).

But in anime it's totally a different story. Maybe because anime is the only medium where purple hair outnumbers common sense. Blonde's aren't as oversaturated. Perhaps it's because anime doesn't come equipped with terrible yellow bleach jobs and regrowth? I dunno, but whatever the reason, Maria-sensei from Tokyo Majin Gakuen Thingamajig makes me go BANANAS.

She even does facial contortions which is like +10pts and puts her up there with Tsunade-sama. In fact, she's even better than Tsunade simply for the fact that it's not hip to like Naruto. Street cred FTW!

P.S. Do you realize how hard it is to find non-H pictures of Tsunade on Danbooru? Yes, she has big tits, WE GET IT.

P.P.S. I got no Valentines cards or chocolate, again. Hallmark has an embargo on my life. Anyone for a suicide pactio?


Sunday, February 11, 2007

Just a few quick recaps...

Hidamari Sketch 1: I had expected a bit after seeing some reviews about, but this really surprised me. How to describe the feeling? Umm.. it's kinda like the surprise you feel when you use 170mb of bandwidth and then wonder what the hell you're doing watching this.

Best way I can sum up the show is that it's like Pani Poni Dash! but really boring less crazy. And none of the characters really have enough personality to drive a slice-of-life show like this.

I guess I'll give it one more episode because it'd be rude otherwise, but wow, it was like watching people sit around a table and talk about photographs. Wait, it's not like that. It is that!

Kekkaishi: Can't remember what ep, but it had wolfo a wolfo action. I prefer it when people are saying "ketsu!" and stuff ("tenketsu!" is the real money) but yeah, this was okay enough.
Oh, I also love the OP and ED music for this series; they need to get some singles out there already.

I'll buy them.


Madarao is totally hard gay, huhu.

Code Geass 16: Even better than the episode before it (and that one had boobix). The payoff may not have been there for everyone, but if Suzuku makes you want to cook up a plate of Eternal-Hate with a side dish of Face-Punch, there was nothing better than watching him get PUNK'D by Mao... and then Mao BLAOW'D by the Pizza Hut broad. Everyone wins!

Kanon 19: OMG STEAMY FAKE-LOLI MAKEOUT, BONUS CHANCE! One thing though.. it's like it took 10 episodes or something for the dorama to start in this show, and it's been people crying non-stop since Mai did bunny cosplay. I like to see girls with tears in their eyes as much as the next guy, but you can have too much of a good thing.

Jigoku Shoujo Futakamori 7: Oh yeah, people are still subbing this? I had almost forgotten about my favourite episodic revenge series. Interesting concept this time, but they skipped the ippen shinde miru so boooo!

Is that blue eyed demon loli gonna actually do anything? So far her purpose seems to be little beyond pissing me off. Don't mess with Ai, chibi whore spawn!

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Saturday, February 10, 2007

Ayo, help a brotherman get his bootleg on

I've had a search about and I've got no idea where you go to find anime t-shirts. I mean, I can find some, but they're a bit craptastic. Surely there's got to be some handy place out there that will allow me to proclaim to the world that I'm a fat smelly geek?

Like is there a one-stop-shop for this kinda thing? Legit is okay, but I don't mind if they're illegally printed works churned out by underpaid Chinese children either. I just want a decent range to peruse, outside of the five FLCL tees you see here or there.

Any suggestions?

(and I know you guys hate leaving comments on Blogger, but pleeease? This is life or death we're talking about, no hyperbole)

Friday, February 09, 2007

Bleach episode 114 reflections

... or as I like to call it: "I waited 60 episodes and got a big Fuck You for my thanks."

I've never been mistaken that Bleach was being produced by KyoAni or anything, but c'mon... You can't shell out a little bit of money on an episode after making us sit through all that Bounto shit? Even with all your child-swindling merchandise profits? That's just plain rude.

55 seconds of Yoruichi eating 15 bowls of food in a row (some that magically shrink in size like Shockwave in transformers. Because drawing plates is hard apparently). ONE MINUTE and 20 seconds of recycled body parts moving up and down as Team Soul Society walk down a hallway. Previews for next week show Tatsuki reading a book in the clubroom for a minute+ and Fred Flinstone walking past the same rock several times.

What's sad is that I'm only exaggerating the last half of that paragraph.

They best be saving up their money for some pretty extravegent stuff, like a battle royale or school ball waltz. Otherwise I'm going to be pretty pissed.

Yuri meganeko and Rukia looked butt as well.

P.S. Get some better fight music while you're at it. The 80s wants it back.

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Thursday, February 08, 2007

Manabi Straight ep3 AKA "Lolis getting hit in the titties"


I really want to say otherwise, but I cannot lie. I was very very dissapointed with this episode. Just when I thought I could count on this being anime's omega pedophile-fix of the year they swerve me and throw in some old, decrepid, geriatric MILF.

For shame ufotable. Now the prosecutors will have to take "reasonable doubt" into account when they put their case together.

Geeze, how ancient are you? What, like, sixteen???

P.S. I'm not really a pedo (so you random traffic viewers don't go getting Google on my ass).

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Saturday, February 03, 2007

The Bloghound: Feburary 3rd Buzz!

Joel Steinberg is a weekly critic for no following publications as of yet WHO LET THE BLOGS OUT? WOOF! WOOF! WOOF! L.O.L, just kidding, it's Joel Steinberg here. We're in the second week of my hit column, and wow, you guys must really like to web-blog because there was so much happening I felt like I was chasing my tail all week! Luckily for you, I managed to stand still long enough to let you know what's happening in this wonderful world of anime.

Hey, time's a wasting. Itadakiblog!

ITEM! It's not a second season, but Master Of Orion Highschool Host Club has a dating game in the works for the Playstation 2! Omigosh, steaky!

GO! Gakuen Utopia Manabi Hard Straight is the show everyone has been talking about for a decade and with good reason! But I am a little concerned. Ufochair, I love the special fx in the opening credits (the shakey camera makes me feel like I'm watching the Emmy award winning NYPD Blue again) but please remove the footage of Manabi-chan and her friends spray painting the school. Vandalism is serious business, thank you!

RAZZ! Goro Miyazaki (star of Mortal Kombat and Mortal Kombat II) has been given a Raspberry Award for worst movie and director of 2006! How any anime can be included in this is ridiculous, but they also listed The Da Vincent Code as a runner up, so these guys obviously know nothing about great adaptations. Bank on it!

NOTICE! What's the hottest shows out of Japan right now? Well, get some ice because Aviator: The Last Airbender and Afro Ninja are both scorching! *SIZZLE!* But does anyone know where I can download the subs, instead?

SUPERSIZE THIS! Sick of eating dumb American food like Taco Bell and French Fries? Why don't you give Naratsu Fruitsu Mangos a try? The Anime Website has the recipe for you, I think it's anime-licious! (hey, let's try to make that a new internet meme guys. I think it's really catchy!)

RUMOUR! Guess what? If you watch this week's Code: Gears closely, you can catch a couple frames of boobs! Japanese are so ecchy! Hey, just remember that Joel Steinberg told you first!

FACT! I just found out that mega-popular KyotoAni's next series is going to be Lolicon Penix! Fingers crossed they can retain the same high standard of artwork as the comics!

R U A SHINOBI? Naruto second season has got a date, and that date is Feburary the 15th! This is so huge that they're making it a one-hour special! I can only hope that means half an hour of recaps, because I don't want to think I've missed anything out (as if, hah hah)!

DES NE! Rain got ya down? Don't worry, because it looks like spring is here! At least, that's according to the new season reviews over at heterosexual blogger. Jeeze, no need to shout about it (not that there's anything wrong that. Some of my best friends are).

MOE! I'm not too interested in this "manga" stuff (Fact: Manga is just like normal comics, except that it's published by Manga Entertainment) or that's to say, I wasn't, until I heard about famous pop singer April Lavigne getting her own series (and in full color unlike those other cheap books)! Well, call me a Sk8r Boye because this sounds awesome!

Phew! You wanna slow it down for next week guys? I don't know if I'll be able to keep this up if you continue like you do! And remember:

If you hear something sniffing about, it's probably just the bloghound on the prowl!